One Forbidden Chance

Author's Note: Hello everyone. I've never actually written a fic before, I've only read them, but I've had some ideas playing in my head that simply won't go away. And so if I can't push them from my thoughts I figured I'd give them a special place in them. Sadly, seeing as I've never done this if I don't get reviews I'll stop writing since I can't be sure if it's any good or terrible. If the formating comes through messed up I will fix it. Just bare with me.

"Hiei, it's time to go," Kurama whispered just loud enough for Hiei to hear. It had only been a year since Kurama's return to Ningenkai when Hiei had come looking for him. Despite Yusuke being officially fired by Koenma the three of them Hiei, Kurama, and Yusuke still stayed on their toes, sending troublesome demons back to Makai. "Hn," Hiei turned to look at Kurama tearing his eyes off of the particularly weak demon, Kurama and Hiei had so easily taken care of. "Where is the Toushin?" Hiei asked.

"Hiei he left a while ago," Kurama responded confused. Hiei seemed so distracted lately, "you've been staring at that demon for too long. I'm suprised he's still alive with all the evil eye he's been getting from you," Kurama teased. "Hn," and with only a twitch Hiei beheaded the demon before stowing his blade. "Let's go Fox," and with that Hiei was off flicking through the trees. Kurama let out a sigh before calling on the plants of the area to dispose of the body as he quickly followed Hiei, marveling along the way at Hiei's small and powerful frame. It didn't take them long to reach Genkai's temple where the two broke company and went seperate ways. Hiei went to rest on a particular tree outside of Genkai's temple, while Kurama began his journey home.

"Mother?" Kurama called as he entered into the home of his human family, confused Kurama stepped into the kitchen finding a note on the counter saying that Shiori and Hatanaka would be working late and Shuichi would be staying the night with a friend. Kurama wasn't suprised by this really, lately his mother and step-father had been working themselves to death, and Kurama's step-brother had been staying with friends often as Hatanaka questioned leaving the boy without parental supervision, despite Kurama's insistence that he watch his step-brother. No matter, Kurama thought as he trudged up the stairs to his bathroom. Realizing he was somewhat sore from keeping pace with Hiei, Kurama undressed himself slowly working the aches from his body as he went. Tossing his jeans, white button down shirt into the nearby hamper Kurama stood in front of the mirror for a moment looking at himself.

Despite his age Kurama still appeared as he did when he first met Hiei, the only change being perhaps his hair was a little longer. Kurama suspected this had something to do with Youko's youki although the voice of his other half had grown quiet for a while when they had first returned to Ningenkai. Lately though Youko was manifesting himself long enough merely to inform Suichi Minamino that he knew three things. First, that Hiei was becoming a reoccuring thought that they both shared. Second, that Hiei would never return those type of thoughts. And third, that they both were reconciled with this fact, but in love with Hiei nonetheless. With a small sigh Kurama finally slid out of his boxers, and stepped into the shower. Turning the water up until it was scalding Kurama sank to a sitting position. I just don't know anymore, Kurama thought closing his eyes, to see a familiar image come to his mind.

Hiei, Kurama reached for his member which was rapidly growing. Wrapping his hand around it Kurama slowly began what was becoming a nightly routine. Hiei laying sprawled across his bed, Hiei sleeping that strange innocent expression on his usually harsh face, Hiei carressing Kurama, these were the thoughts running through Kurama's head as began to reach his climax. Letting out a moan Kurama reached his climax. If only, Kurama thought before stopping himself. This pain of knowing his love was impossible was always greatest following release. Standing up shakily Kurama cleaned himself both from his pleasure and his day. Gods, Kurama thought, why do you plague me? With another sigh as he toweled himself off Kurama reached for the night-time clothes that he always left sitting near his bathroom sink. Kurama slowly trudged down the stairs to pull leftovers from the fridge, which he ate cold, not really caring what he was eating.

After finishing his dinner Kurama debated on leaving his dishes undone, but being the caring son of two hard working and doting parents Kurama couldn't bare the guilt. So despite his depression he quickly washed his dishes, dried them, and put them back where they belonged. Suddenly, a thought crossing his mind Kurama ran back up the stairs and pulled out his notebook from one of his classes. Having been absent so frequently, unknown to his family, Kurama had a pile of schoolwork to finish before his admission to higher learning. He had finished nearly all of it and turned it in, this one notebook however left one page unfinished. In it there was an assignment entitled, "How do you define love?" for his creative writings course. I'm not sure I have an answer to that anymore, Kurama sighed as he sat down at his desk. Openning the notebook to its single empty page, Kurama began to write. He found thoughts coming to him quickly that he added to the paper such as, "Love, it's when you care so much you are afraid to lose someone or something to the point you would rather sacrifice your own life and yet at the same time, you would be willing to give that someone or something up if it would make them or it happy." Suprised out how quickly he had filled the front and back of the page Kurama began to write further on seperate sheets of paper which he inserted carefully into the binding of the notebook.

Looking at the clock and seeing it read 8:27PM Kurama was suprised, time had passed so quickly tonight. Leaving a note on the table telling his mother he had gone out briefly to see a friend Kurama went to the nearest mail pickup. Sealing his notebook in a brown wrapping material, much like what packages come in Kurama wrote the mailing address of his school which was only miles away on the wrapping. Kurama had been avoiding people, and he knew it. He just couldn't stand to see everyone so happy anymore. He still put on his usual facade though and pretended that everything was alright. When someone would ask him if he was ok, he would smile that innocent smile and tell them of course he was. Having attended to his errand Kurama decided to go see Kuwabara who suprisingly had really gotten his act together. Kuwabara was studying to attend University in the fall to become a teacher, he still went to visit Yukina and was very much in love with her. He had even asked her to be his girlfriend, which although at the time she didn't totally understand, she had agreed. Knocking on Kuwabara's door Kurama half-expected Shizuru to answer the door, but he quickly dismissed that thought as he heard the psychic girl yell at her brother, "Kazuma you idiot. Go get the damn door, it's Kurama," after what suspiciously sounded like a crashing sound and muffled cry of pain, a battered and weary Kuwabara answered the door. Perking up at his friend's arrival Kuwabara smiled and said, "Heya Kurama, what brings you over this late?"

"Oh, I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time," Kurama replied. "I just thought I would stop by seeing as I've scarcely seen you since I first left for Makai." Kuwabara's face contorted into a mixture of guilt and awkwardness as he struggled to respond, "Yeah I know it's just been busy," was all he could think to say. Kuwabara invited Kurama in anyway, and the two spent some time catching up on things before Kurama finally asked Kuwabara, "Hey Kuwabara, what would you say love is? That is how would you define love?" Kuwabara paused at the question to think. "Gee Kurama, that's a hell of a question to spring on someone," Kuwabara replied, and then realizing Kurama really wanted an answer, he paused to think. After a few moments, Kuwabara replied, "Well I'd say that love is when you really care about someone, it's when you'd go through all sorts of hardships to keep them safe and happy, like me and Eikichi. I'd do anything for my kit," then realizing Kurama's origin Kuwabara turned pink. Then the two both began to laugh first Kuwabara and then Kurama. When they both finally stopped laughing Kurama thanked Kuwabara saying, "Thank you for your honesty Kuwabara, and I haven't laughed like that in a long time." Kuwabara grinned and the two continued to talk as though nothing had ever been said that would be out of the ordinary. Around 10:30PM Kurama said his goodbyes to Kuwabara and to Shizuru before heading back to his own home. He wasn't suprised to find that the house was still empty and so once again he climbed the stairs to his room and turned on the television to watch a movie. Once the movie started however, Kurama found himself sidetracked, he merely stared at the screen, even after the ending credits of the movie had played. His thoughts were elsewhere, specificly, a little hiyoukai. Snapping out of his reverie Kurama turned off the television and laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. Even if I can only keep him happy and safe that is what I'll do, Kurama thought sleepily. He could not bare the thought of a world where Hiei didn't exist.

That night Kurama's dreams dwelled on Hiei, as they did so many other nights. Just on dreams of happiness, of the two walking down a busy street together holding hands. Of sitting in the park near where Kurama lived. Just simple things, things that Kurama knew would never come to pass. What Kurama didn't know was that Hiei spent that night, in the tree outside Kurama's window. Hiei had come to Kurama with a question and instead of an answer had gotten a dozen more as he had followed Kurama to Kuwabara's home and heard their conversation. "Is that what I feel then?" Hiei whispered staring up at the stars in that small Tokyo suburb. Hiei was still confused and had no idea what course of action to take. He had been thinking of Kurama more and more lately and his only solution to things he had felt was to train harder and to push such silly thoughts from his mind. Emotions, such as love and happiness were for the weak. Or at least they were not for the Forbidden Child. Hiei knew that no matter what he felt, Kurama would never return anything more than friendship. Or so they both thought anyway.

Author's Note: Yes yes. I know it was very short and I apologize for it being so short it's just I have this terrible feeling it's not any good and so by my nature I have to stop myself. However I promise that if even one review comes through the story will continue. As you can see from the tags it would be one hell of a show. I hope. Please review if you like what has been written. If I get good reviews I'll continue. Promise.