rate_review Reviews

Forgive me for only skimming through this one. I've seen that episode (well, a given since I've seen almost all of them anyway) so I only looked for the parts where your plot line was evident in what was already established. I'm still wondering about Touya's most recent physical ailment--you won't keep me long now, won't you?

Hmph--Well, if no one else has the sense to do it, then I'm proud to be your *sole* patron for the moment. How about next time I update I try giving you a little promo, eh? I've promised to do the same for a friend of mine regarding an origific over at fictionpress, so what the hell? I'll have an opening A/N full of promotions! XD

I wonder, did Touya miscarry or something? Don't make me wait too long for an answer!

Well, given as how not much is said about ice demons aside from the Koorime in the show, you have a lot of room for liberty with that. Besides, with the case of the Koorime at least, the entire race is hermaphrodite (makes you kinda wonder about Hiei, no?), so go for it.

And I can absolutely picture Kurama comforting Touya like that. Looking forward to the next installment ^_^

Sweet, you updated. But the Internet in my room is being the wanker, and I don't know if I want to sit here on ground floor to read this (feel too much like I'm on some time limit or something), so I'll read and leave a proper review later, okay. Here's to hoping they fix that wired network problem sometime today!

So this is all still prior to where you originally began?

Anyway--I didn't think that Risho would have *that* sort of relationship with Touya, but from what I recall he was a domineering power-hungry character, so I could see it. I liked your portrayal of the friendship between Jin and Touya and between Hiei and Kurama, though I'm unsure of if there's any romances lurking there (well, aside from the two thus stated at chapter's end). Now, I'm wondering if Risho's assault on Touya has any correlation to the warning in the summary...

This is really good. I have a suggestion for you though. Try putting a blank line between paragraphs. It makes it easier to read on screen. Otherwise, I like it and would love to read more.

Okay, so I had to re-read everything because apparently the content of the original two chapters shall come up later on ... But, I cannot complain, because I've been doing a re-write on the earlier part of one of my own stories.

It was good. I felt like some of them were behaving more OOC than in the original, but I don't know, we'll see where they go. You might want to consider placing spaces between your paragraphs, as that would make them easier to read, and to save you Author's Notes for either the beginning or ending of the chapter, rather than sliding them in here and there throughout. Nonetheless, still as interesting as before, and I look forward to when this revised version catches up and exceeds where the original one left off ^__^

Don't behave like it's such an odd pairing; it is certainly among the unorthodox ones in a consensus sort of sense, but it certainly is unheard of ^__^ Besides, they do complement each other, now don't they? Haha, anyways--I actually don't think you wrote them too OOC at all (although, it has been some time since I have watched more than mere clips of the Dark Tournament, but I trust my memory). I think this has very promising beginnings, and do hope that you'll continue and update.

Wait, my bad--I meant, above, that while it is uncommon, it certainly is *not* unheard of. Good thing I caught myself, since that words omission completely changes what I was trying to say!