Singles for Sale: Pearls and Roses

Title: Singles for Sale: Roses and Pearls
By: Aki_Yume
Anime: Yu Yu Hakusho

Author's Note: Okay, I'll say it right now: I have updating problems at random times. If you don't like that, I'm really sorry, but I ALWAYS try my best to write new chapters when I say I will. I LOVE you ALL, and I PRAY that you'll enjoy my story. Flamers are, as always, strongly discouraged. xD

Disclaimer: Don't a single character EXCEPT for Maki Ayumatsu.... She is a character I modeled after myself (<->SFS was based on a joke at my expense that gave me an idea.)

ALTERATIONS: Kurama, Yuusuke, and Kuwabara are normal spirit detectives. =P I won't spoil anymore x3

On with it!

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"Suuichi, please? For me?" The crimson haired youkai in human guise stared at the woman who had allowed him to be reborn with a sour look on his face. After a moment of silence, the young man shook his head, sending his ruby curls bouncing in the air.

"Why are you asking me to do such an embarrassing thing? Honestly," He turned away from the sweet older lady and reached down to pick up his backpack. "There are more appropriate things your company could do to raise money for Ayumatsu-san's Breast Cancer Foundation."

The woman pouted, sticking out her bottom lip, a gesture that always made Kurama feel like an utter asshole for denying her what she wanted; it was rather similar to the human saying "taking candy from a baby" and watching the baby sniffle and cry.

"Suuichi, the company I work for publishes romance novels," she was taking great care in explaining everything, and it was almost enough to irritate the fox spirit. "We decided it would be a fun idea to help raise money for women by holding a bachelor-babe auction!" Kurama's eyes grew to the size of discs. He knew well enough that her mother and her boss at SexPistoL, Maki Ayumatsu, in one room together spelled out trouble. Together, the two women came up with the most outlandish ideas possible, but they would also make them seem totally feasible. Still, him, Kurama, a powerful trickster fox of a demon, in a "Bachelor-Babe" Auction? He really did not like the sound of that, but could he really deny his mother something? Especially something that was obviously extremely important? He really didn't need his pride, he had been a Spirit Detective for over two years, and with Yusuke Urameshi and Kazuma Kuwabara as his team mates, there was nothing in the world that could possibly even come close to being as embarrassing.

The woman in question was being of no help in the matter, and she seemed to be reading the demon's mind.

"Suuichi, please?" Her golden brown eyes were on the verge of tears and dark black curls bounced with every fake sniffle she mustered. "We only have a small hand full of men that are willing to help, and you're twenty! There would be no hassle for you!"

Kurama bit his tongue in order not to say what he fully intended.

"Yes mother," He hissed calmly. He turned around from the tea kettle to face puppy dog eyes and a depressed sniffle. For a moment, the red head youkai paused and thought about the whole idea. Being auctioned off to a stranger he did not know for a week. He would have to do everything that person said as long as it did not cross his level of comfort or legality. A week of living with someone else, away from his mother but also away from his college classes... That offer was extremely tempting. His classes were not challenging enough, and too many swooning women were in them. It really could not hurt to simply try out the idea... Could it?

Oh hell with it. Kurama thought to himself. With a sigh spreading quickly through the room, Kurama gave up to his mother's wishes.

"Alright mother, I will do it for you." His words were soft and even although laced with apprehension. The tall being had no idea what he was getting himself into with this, he really did not.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Hiei, please will you go with me?" The soft muffled cry behind the closed door disturbed the petite man's mind. Hiei snorted to himself, his crazily spiky hair shaking with the movement of his head. He shook his head again, this time intentionally and dropped the wrench he was holding onto his workbench. Wiping his greasy fingers off with a red rag covered in grease and oil, the raven haired being carefully tip-toed around the mess that was his garage. Tools were littered on the ground, oil cans decorated one corner, and dirty clothing was piled up next to a brand new pristine washer and dryer. With one last glance for the day to his prized black and sleek Honda Interceptor motorcycle before heading back into the house. It was the most expensive thing we owned; and like a responsible older sibling trying to set and example for his younger sister, he had earned all of the money for it on his own. The trust fund thy shared wasn't dipped into for this piece of art and beauty.

A pair of adorable crystal blue eyes were waiting for him the moment he opened the door. Yukina had on her 'don't you love me?' face, and it scared Hiei to death. The last time she had that look on her face, he had to deal with a psychotic, over-obsessive mob boss that wanted to kill her if she refused to give them millions of yen from their trust fund.

"Please tell me that you have not gotten us into a remarkable amount of trouble, little sister." To anyone else, his voice would seem flat, absent of emotion. However, to a trained ear, one that was used to his presence, subtle hints of concern were woven into his cold statement to his younger sister. Her pale hair shimmered in the kitchen light; making her seem much more fragile than her already lithe frame appeared as.

"No," even her voice was delicate, a fresh breeze in the middle of a barren wasteland. "I need you to take me to my friend's older sister's roommate's younger brother's girlfriend's auction!"

Whoa there... Hiei's head was spinning. That was much more complicated than it needed to be. The small man stalked to his room on the bottom floor and picked up his electric guitar, flipping the switch to 'on'. Practiced fingers flew across the frets as the crimson paint job flashed through the room; painting the black walls momentarily a deep maroon.

"What kind of auction is this?" He spoke with a raised voice; it was hard to hear normal volume with the shrill sounds from the guitar flowing through the air. He watched as Yukina made a face at his favorite instrument. Even straining his ears, Hiei couldn't hear a single word Yukina spoke, and cut the power to his musical device.

"--guy auction." Hiei's eyebrows disappeared underneath the sweatband he wore to make sure his eyes were protected during the time he chose to work on his motorcycle.

"What did you say?" He asked. His mind voted to set down the guitar and head for the kitchen in order to process the information that was about to come in the mail via Yukina. He didn't have to look behind him to know she was there--the girl was rather a lot like a shadow to him. He stood frozen in place, waiting for a better explanation than just two little words.

"It's kind of a guy auction," She replied, her eyes cast on the ground. "My friend wants me to go, and she even gave me a free ticket! It's supposed to be really exclusive."

Hiei rolled his eyes and replaced his instrument back on its stand. The trouble his sister always seemed to accidentally get them into always started with something that seemed fun and simple.

"I'll think about taking you." He grumbled. Without a thing to do, he went to the CD collection he had over his bed and popped in the new Gilgamesh album he'd purchased just the other day. He smirked as he felt the haunting melodies flow through him. He closed his eyes and imagined he was playing in front of a large audience, one that loved his every move and screamed when a song went into a guitar solo.

"Hiei!" Imagination popped and reality dropped on the old teenager. He growled and faced his little sister, almost close to annoyed with her.

"Yes Yukina?" He asked. A nervous blanket wrapped itself around Hiei's petite body as he stared at the growing irritation in his sister's sapphire eyes. Her face reflected a light pink twinge.

"Hiei!" She frowned and Hiei prepared for the good-natured onslaught he was sure to get in a few seconds. "You can't just sit here all day and tinker with your toys! Please will you go with me? I really want to go, but I'm not comfortable going by myself."

Clear raindrop tears formed at the corner of her eyes and Hiei found he surely couldn't say no to his wonderfully adorable little sister. He watched intently as Yukina leaned on one foot, trying to balance herself out in their mess of a house.

"And we need to get out of this house," She frowned. "I need real air."

Hiei couldn't blame her. He was the one that was charged with the task of keeping the house clean and taking care of everything while Yukina was at school earning her degree. However, he really had neglected to pick up around the house, and in return, their expensive home looked like a typhoon had run through it. Piles of dirty laundry that were waiting to be done surrounded the washer/dryer unit. Hieie didn't need to look around to know that he hadn't dusted in kami knew how long, and he didn't even want to think about the kitchen. Some things were just meant to be left alone. He pinched the bridge of his own nose; he knew he's already lost this argument with his little sister.

"Alright, I'll go with you." He moaned. He knew without a doubt that he would regret this decisions later, but at the moment, it really didn't matter. All that did matter was making sure she didn't spend too much money at the auction. As he turned to go out the door and wait for Yukina to catch up with him for lunch, he could only think of one thing:

What am I getting myself into?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Isn't this Saturday when the auction is?" Kurama asked timidly, not wanting to throw off his mother from her current mission. The older woman turned back on her son and frowned.

"Yes, it is," She replied, her eyes flashing deep thought. "Did you fill out that little slip I gave you?"

The red head youkai smiled sweetly at his wonderfully newly eccentric mother and nodded.

"Yes mother, I did," he said. "I actually took it to Ayumatsu-san yesterday." But that didn't answer why his mother was digging through his closet.

"Good, sweetie!" Kurama paid attention to his mother while dodging pieces of his own wardrobe. "We just need to figure out what you should wear now, I'm glad I decided to help you!"

Kurama didn't know what to think of his mother at this point, he decided to wait and see what his mother would pick out for him. His only hope was that she didn't try to get him to wear some embarrassing S&M costume he was bound to have hidden behind some article of clothing. For a breather, he decided to go to the bathroom and splash some water on his face. With the cold liquid running down his face, he let out a sigh of apprehension and frowned.

"What am I getting myself into?" For a split second, the redhead's mind swirled and a sense of vertigo went soaring through him. Kurama dried his face off with shaky hands just in time to hear his mother call out to him.

"Yes, mother?" He asked. Ms. Minamino held out two hangers, still staring into the walk-in closet planted in Kurama's room. The half-scared youkai took a moment to look at what she'd given him.

"Mother!" He shouted. If he had been a woman, he would have fainted. This startled her out of the daydream.

"Yes, Suuichi?" Her innocent smile told Kurama that she fully knew which pants she'd given him.

"These," He held out the pair of jeans she'd handed him. "Haven't been worn since middle school."

"And back then they were too long for you to wear," She responded. "Which means they'll fit now."

At that moment, he wasn't worried about his humiliation, just how sorry he felt for the person that would try to cope a feel; those jeans weren't going to leave room for his jewels to be comfortable in the least bit.

"I have a very bad feeling about this." He really said it to himself, but mother dearest couldn't be fooled. Kurama found himself face to face with a stern look from dear mama.

"Suuichi!" Her pout made Kurama want to jump off a building. "I just want to make sure you look good."

"But mother," Kurama injected his opinion to this loosing battle. "Causing all of the blood to flow out of my lower region is not likely to get me purchased."

"Please just try it on?" Kurama pinched the bridge of his nose a second time and nodded. He remembered what he had written down for his extremely short biography they wanted for the auction. His mother said make sure to say the most unique interests he had, and Kurama had decided on, "role playing, music, and the stranger things in life." Kurama scoffed at his reflection in the mirror at his own words. The stranger things in life was such an understatement. Disappearing into the bathroom, Kurama took a few moments to shrug on his shirt, which seemed to be a white tank top splotched with silver silkscreen drops that looked almost like splashed paint on a canvas. His over shirt was a white collared shirt that sported his favorite band patches and strategic rips on his arms, revealing that he was quite fit. The pants were the real challenge. He took one side of the waistband with one hand and pulled. They slid along his leg until they reached his thighs, and stuck to him like glue.

"Damn." He mumbled to himself. He really couldn't go out like this. With one look at his mother to fins she wasn't paying attention, Kurama closed his eyes and tugged, using a slight bit of his youkai strength. He managed to get the pants on, but moving would be a different thing entirely. He walked stiffly out of the bathroom and to his waiting mother. Her face lit up several different shades of ecstatic and she jumped for joy before him.

"You look perfect!" She exclaimed. "That part'll be no problem for you!"

A sinking feeling in Kurama's guy caused him to speak out loud.

"What do you mean, 'other part', mother?" He looked back at her seriously, and the gaze he was met with only told him that he was in for something that would test him far beyond what had been thrown at him as a Spirit Detective.

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Aki_Yume: Yo guys, here's another fic I'm throwing out to you sharks. =P Flamers (the mean kind) make me sad, so shoe! Dx
haha! But anyway, I love you all and I'll see you next chapter. Mata ne!