Loony

LOONY: CHAPTER 1

Kurama: What are you doing?

Author: Typing.

Kurama: Why?

Author: I have my reasons. Why you asking?

Kurama: Just curious, that's all.

Author: Oh.

Kurama: It looks like you're getting nowhere with this.

Author: Oh really. Okay, how's about this.

* An anvil drops behind Kurama almost hitting him.*

Kurama: HAY!!! WHERE IN THE FUCK DID THAT ANVIL COME FROM?!?

Author: Well, you said this typing was getting nowhere. So I got it somewhere.

Kurama: Well that wasn't vary nice.

Author: Well who ever said I was nice. I sure didn't.

Kurama: Well what kind of author are you anyway?

Author: A sadistic one.

*Then New Kids On the Block starts playing on the author's TV.*

Kurama: Is that New Kids On the Block I'm hearing on your TV?

Author: Yup, sure sounds like it. You want me to keep it or change it?

Kurama: CHANGE IT! CHANGE IT! I'LL DO ANYTHING YOU SAY! JUST CHANGE IT!!!

*A few minutes later the song on the TV. ends*

Author: Too late, the song is done already.

Kurama: Thank God. I was about to yell for Hiei to come over and kill me.

Author: Speaking of Hiei, does he know that he stole Vegeta’s hair style.

Kurama: Who's Vegeta?

Author: You mean that you never heard of the mighty Saiyan prince Vegeta?

Kurama: Nope I'm afraid not. Should I have?

Author: Well, yah. He works at Cartoon Network on the Toonami show. The same Toonami show as Yu Yu Hakusho is seen on.

*Author leaves momentarily to see what was on Cartoon Network that night, then went to the bathroom and then to get herself some instant coffee.*

Kurama: What took you so damn long?

Author: Potty, TV, and coffee. Why? Did you miss me?

Kurama: Well, maybe just a little. Did you miss me?

Author: Depends on what you mean by miss.

Kurama: What do you mean it depends on what I meant by miss?

Author: Well there was me leaving for a bit and...

Kurama: And what?

Author: Don't forget that I missed you with that anvil, remember?

Kurama: You got me there or in a matter of speaking, almost got me. Are you going to try to hit me with another anvil again? Because I don't need that.

Author: You're right you don't. You need to be tortured in other ways.

Kurama: In what ways or dare I even ask?

Author: Dare! Dare!

Kurama: You are sadistic aren’t you?

Author: Yep!

Kurama: Well does my sadistic torturer have a name or is your name really Author as in King Author?

Author: Yes I have a name and it's Cindy. Happy now?

* From this point onward the author is known as Cindy. *

Kurama: Yes I am. Now I have a name to my friendly sadistic tormenter. Have you done any other type of torture to any other cartoon characters before me?

Cindy: A couple of times but the stories never panned out.

Kurama: Sorry to hear that.

Cindy: Hay, Kurama. I got a proposition for you.

Kurama: Oh, what is it?

Cindy: I want to write fan-fiction stories involving you and Hiei. So what do you think?

Kurama: Sounds fun. I don't know about Hiei though? He might not be interested.

* Then Hiei pokes is head out to see what Kurama was doing and who he was talking to.*

Hiei: Hay, Kurama. Who are you talking to?

Kurama: Oh Hiei. This is Cindy and we're going to be in her fan fiction from now on.

Hiei: Oh. Um, Kurama.

Kurama: Yes, what is it?

Hiei: Cindy disappeared.

Kurama: Again!

* Cindy comes back.*

Cindy: Sorry had to make some coffee. If you want some just help yourselves.

Kurama: Thank you.

Hiei: Yah, thanks.

* Both of them gets some coffee and come back.*

Cindy: So as I was going to say. I'll be using you two in my fan fiction. So what do yah say.

Hiei: Well.. I don't know.

Cindy: What do you mean you don't know?

Kurama: What I think Hiei is tying to say is are you experienced in writing fan fiction?

Cindy: Yes I am and if you’re wondering on how many stories I've written, I've written too many to count.

Kurama: That's good to know. For how long now.

Cindy: Since I was in 8th grade, which was back in 1987 - 1988 which would make it about 19 - 20 years now. How's that for a writing career.

Kurama: Impressive.

Hiei: Hold on one minute. What do we get out of it.

Cindy: What do you mean by what you get out of it?

Hiei: I mean I want to be complicated for my appearance in your fiction I don't work for free you know.

* We see Kurama shake his head.*

Cindy: OK., What are your demands.

Hiei: I want to be a major character in your stories. I want a decent place to live, preferably someplace warm.

* We see Kurama scribble on a large piece of poster-board with a big permeate maker and holding it up behind Hiei so he wouldn't see but Cindy could. The sign said Sahara Dessert.*

Cindy: Any thing else?

Hiei: Big lizards.

Cindy & Kurama: Big lizards?

Hiei: Yah, big lizards. Hay I got to have something to keep me on my toes.

* Cindy and Kurama look at each other and both smile evilly. Then an anvil drops near Hiei.*

Hiei: WHAT THE FUCKING HELL WAS THAT!!!

Kurama: Anvil.

*Then a chestnut falls on the back of his head.*

Hiei: OWUIE!!! Who hit me!?!

*Cindy points to a chestnut tree and we see a guy with long dark hair sitting down next to the tree tossing and caching chestnuts while having a big not so friendly smile on his face looking strait at Hiei.*

Kurama: Who in the hell is he?

Cindy: Oh, that's just Jason. You can him Jason, Jay or even Anti, but just don't call him Mr. Beck. He hates that.

Hiei: Oh really?! Well I'll just call him Mr. Beck!

*We see Hiei slowly walk up to Jason with an evil smirk on his face.*

Kurama: Don't worry, I'll handle this.

*Kurama takes out a red rose.*

Kurama: Rose Whip!

*The whip wraps around Hiei and then the whip wraps around a branch of the chestnut tree that is over Jason's head. Hiei is now swinging upside down from the tree in front of Jason.*

Hiei: THIS ISN'T FUNNY KURAMA! GET ME DOWN FROM HERE NOW!!!

*Jason starts to throw chestnuts at Hiei making Hiei swing.*

Cindy & Kurama: Oh yes it is!

Cindy: Well I got to start the next chapter.

Kurama: There's going to be chapters of this thing?!

Cindy: Yah. My stories, my rules. So who I'm I going to pick on next.

Jason: Pick on Joey, Joey Wheeler.

Cindy: Why Joey Wheeler?

Jason: I don't know.

Cindy: Who would you pick Kurama?

Kurama: Seto Kaiba simply because I think he's a jackass and that Vegeta guy because I want see his reaction to Hiei stealing his hair style.

Cindy: Oookkaayy. How 'bout you Hiei?

Hiei: I DON'T CARE JUST GET ME DOWN!!!

*And Jason plunks Hiei in the head with several chestnuts.*

Jason: You really want to call me Mr. Beck!?!

Cindy: Well I want Trunks and Bakura. So want to end this first chapter and go on to chapter 2?

Kurama: Sure, why not.

Cindy: OK.. See ya next chapter you happy screaming peoples.

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Questions to ponder till the next chapter.

Will Hiei ever get untangled from the tree?

Will Vegeta sue Hiei for stealing his hair-do?

Who will Cindy attack with an anvil next?

What evil plans does Jason have planed for Joey Wheeler?

These and many more in the next chapter.