rate_review Reviews

It's a bit of a confusing story but I like it. There are parts that just seem kind of weird but at the same time I like them. It's a really good story and I'm curious as to if this is the end of it. If you need a beta, I'm available.

Well, that was different. Awesome, but different. I think I like seeing the four of them together.

For some reason, that reminded me of Loveless. The idea of two beings that are merged into one through trust becoming one, and having individual names as well as a shared one, that is. The bondage thing also reminded me of it. I'm curious, have you ever read Loveless? If so, is that where you got the idea? If not, where did you get it?

The beginning was thoroughly confusing. Most of it had me re-reading the same lines in an attempt to understand what was going on. I think I only understood sometime near the end, right before the scene in which Kurama woke up. Although I know there was a scene change. I think it began with Hiei and Yusuke? It's hard to guess just from eye color. I really couldn't tell where it switched. I'm going to re-read the whole thing once I'm finished, I'm sure.

On the whole, the concept is interesting. I give the first chapter a four only because of my utter confusion about the first half of it. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I only wish I could come up with stuff as interesting as this...

Well, I'm sure that was a useless review. I'll be sure to ask more questions once I've read the second chapter. The only thing I can poke at, yet again, is the spelling and grammar in certain places. Something so minor as that, however, barely distracts from the story. So the rating stays the same, regardless of grammar.

See you in the next chapter! *bows and gives a Youko/Shuichi Kurama plushie*

(Leaving my Email for the sake of convenience. Just in case...)
-Nikatsin@yahoo.com

How can I say your grammar was bad when the grammar in my last review was so horrible? Well, I guess that's what I get for trying to review while I'm tired AND trying to Beta something at the same time. It just doesn't work so great. Your grammar is really fine, by the way. I have to run my stories through a Spell-checker five or six times before I've caught everything. You won't be seeing them posted on any fan-fiction sites, either. They're all staying nice and locked up on my Livejournal where no one can flame me for them.

ANYWAYS, I better get to actually reviewing. The first thing I noticed was that it doesn't resemble Loveless as much as I thought. One of your reviewers said YuGiOh? That might be closer, but I don't know. I've never read very much of it, either. I do like the concept, but the lack of Hiei in this chapter made me feel a little sad. I relate to him the easiest, and usually try to look at it from either his or Yusuke's point of view.

I enjoyed the symbolism very much. The line “Some, yes. So was Hiei…more than I was, but because he’s lived longer.-” brought me to the conclusion that the bindings symbolize anxieties, pain and guilt experienced throughout life. Love and trust in another frees them from those bindings. The fear is that they will be hurt by the other person if they don’t guard themselves. Well, that may be obvious to some people, but not to me. I’d like to think about it a bit more, though.

After re-reading it, the first chapter ceases to confuse me. Now that I know what to look for, I can easily understand what’s going on. It is indeed a very good fiction. I’m sure it’s going to be another one of my favorites.

My last note: I wish I could draw. I would make a doujinshi out of this if I could. At least a few portraits of them each in that surreal, bound form.

~Nika
(Nikatsin@yahoo.com)

that was so cool and well written!

I FINISHED JUST IN TIME! that was good, and freaky, but interesting. give yourself a pat on the back! (wow...i sure am high on crack today)

I have to tell you....I love the way you portray Youko and Suiichi! Your stories are wonderful and the 'dream' Kurama had was awsome.

damn. i LOVE your author comments! and i know i reviewed this.. but.. still. xD it deserves the review!! that's all i can say. xD i don't even remember what i said.. and i WOULD reread it.. but.. i'm soooo tired..... i was going to go to bed..but then i saw you had something else i didn't read.. and i saw this too.. so.. you know. i thought i'd be nice and leave you a little comment. or not so little comment. :p because i DO remember i loved it. ^^ and that i was probably singing Poison songs at you. *giggles* :: life goes on when your miles away and i need you... time goes on as night steals the day... :: ^^ perfect example. "Life Goes On" but yeh. That, my dear, is your serenade of the night. i hope you liked the hairmetal... even if it was only two lines.. xD cause i'm so way addicted to Poisin. it's good for your health. ^~


i'll read more tomorrow. and hope i'm more coherent. or something. heh. something. love to ya! ^^

Ra

There, I'm reviewing! Jeeze. Like you need to know that if I wasn't broke I'd pay your for writing these stories. :P

wow great chapter