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May 3, 2016 at 12:00 AM
You haven't updated in ages! Please update soon. I really want to know what happens!
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July 7, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I love your story and I hope you finish it soon :)
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May 29, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I read through this last night and today and I have really enjoyed it!!
I wish you would add more!
This is a great story and I would love to know what has happened :-)
I wish you would add more!
This is a great story and I would love to know what has happened :-)
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October 11, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Hello, I just stayed up past 2:30 AM to read your story Alpha from the first chapter to the latest and now to e-mail you about it! :) First, I want to say I hope you'll be finishing the story as I've really enjoyed it! It'd be a shame to leave things unfinished.
Second, I tried to e-mail you this but it bounced back, so I signed up for an account so I could level a review. So... To begin with you've got some typos and places where you started typing a word and then retyped (like perhperhaps). If you ever have the chance to go back through and edit you'll find them, but it doesn't interfere too much with reading. I love to see people experiment with writing and second person makes for such a great challenge. Sometimes though you are inconsistent with your tense and switch between past and present tense. Second person can be tricky, believe me I know, so that's something to look out for in the future. I generally find it easier to write second person purely in present tense.
Third, I have to say opening premise of mutually agreed to physical-only relationship isn't one I've ever seen before so that was very intriguing. I've seen a lot of cliche premises for getting a character involved with the YYH cast from my days on Quizilla. I also like how you've worked not to make it one of those "omg we are in true love after the first chapter" type of works. I really appreciate the cold and distant attitude Hiei maintains for several chapters toward "you." Hell, that he's been trying to maintai for most of the entire story so far! He isn't exactly a warm and fuzzy kind of guy, after all. ;) Anyway, it's a fun read for any Hiei fangirl seeking a little self-indulgence and I just wanted to pass along my thoughts about your story.
Take care and keep writing! ^_^
{{{}One Amahira{}}}
Second, I tried to e-mail you this but it bounced back, so I signed up for an account so I could level a review. So... To begin with you've got some typos and places where you started typing a word and then retyped (like perhperhaps). If you ever have the chance to go back through and edit you'll find them, but it doesn't interfere too much with reading. I love to see people experiment with writing and second person makes for such a great challenge. Sometimes though you are inconsistent with your tense and switch between past and present tense. Second person can be tricky, believe me I know, so that's something to look out for in the future. I generally find it easier to write second person purely in present tense.
Third, I have to say opening premise of mutually agreed to physical-only relationship isn't one I've ever seen before so that was very intriguing. I've seen a lot of cliche premises for getting a character involved with the YYH cast from my days on Quizilla. I also like how you've worked not to make it one of those "omg we are in true love after the first chapter" type of works. I really appreciate the cold and distant attitude Hiei maintains for several chapters toward "you." Hell, that he's been trying to maintai for most of the entire story so far! He isn't exactly a warm and fuzzy kind of guy, after all. ;) Anyway, it's a fun read for any Hiei fangirl seeking a little self-indulgence and I just wanted to pass along my thoughts about your story.
Take care and keep writing! ^_^
{{{}One Amahira{}}}
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November 4, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Awesome story! Hope you update!
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August 1, 2009 at 12:00 AM
i really like the story. what happens next? keep up the good work.
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January 18, 2008 at 12:00 AM
O___O
Omg, woouh... yes I thought there would come a rape XD! God, a stone fell from my heart... Gosh I was really scarred, ne ^__^;;
But damn it's so good, know I've told so many times n_n;; But honestly, I just can't get dissapointed, it's so great! Uhh I've to get to draw something for you soon!
By the way :b I've wrote you a mail, to the email adress you gave in a later chap. I hope you get it and reply!!! ^__^
Wuuh I loove giving feedback, yay yay!
~Bouken <3
btw, this email:
Olympianoct@yahoo.com doesn't work...
I've tried to mail you, but my mail delevery always sent it back, telling the mail didn't exists... :/ please add me to your mails list so I can write ;__;
Omg, woouh... yes I thought there would come a rape XD! God, a stone fell from my heart... Gosh I was really scarred, ne ^__^;;
But damn it's so good, know I've told so many times n_n;; But honestly, I just can't get dissapointed, it's so great! Uhh I've to get to draw something for you soon!
By the way :b I've wrote you a mail, to the email adress you gave in a later chap. I hope you get it and reply!!! ^__^
Wuuh I loove giving feedback, yay yay!
~Bouken <3
btw, this email:
Olympianoct@yahoo.com doesn't work...
I've tried to mail you, but my mail delevery always sent it back, telling the mail didn't exists... :/ please add me to your mails list so I can write ;__;
schedule
January 18, 2008 at 12:00 AM
btw, this email:
Olympianoct@yahoo.com doesn't work...
I've tried to mail you, but my mail delevery always sent it back, telling the mail didn't exists... :/ please add me to your mails list so I can write ;__;
schedule
January 17, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Waah it's so AWESOME!
I've read up to chapter 10 now, but you'll still get reviews on the others =3 daaaaaahh I'm so fixed in this spell binding story.
I saw in last chapter that you aren't finished, and somehow it makes me happy, cause the best about reading a damn good story is also the trilling to wait for a new chap, like in a manga serie (you'll always have to wait to the update) and when it's finaly there you screams of joy and reads even more carefull...
Until now, I've not been dissapointed ONCE by this story, as said: YOU ROCKS!!!
Huhu, it's so awesome I've got those powers laying within my ki :D imagination has always been me, and the best is I actual have an OC I made cause I'm a screaming fangirl of YYH~and Hiei is my fave of couse :b
And funny enough she's also Ookami O.o, different looks but still...
OH yeah, put me on the mailing list Onegai *puppy eyes* Don't know how to do myself 4w4
But here you have a fan, in me :3 I'll check out your Kurama story, cause he's my Nii-san ^w^ and my friend has a crusch on him XD haah...
~Bouken
I've read up to chapter 10 now, but you'll still get reviews on the others =3 daaaaaahh I'm so fixed in this spell binding story.
I saw in last chapter that you aren't finished, and somehow it makes me happy, cause the best about reading a damn good story is also the trilling to wait for a new chap, like in a manga serie (you'll always have to wait to the update) and when it's finaly there you screams of joy and reads even more carefull...
Until now, I've not been dissapointed ONCE by this story, as said: YOU ROCKS!!!
Huhu, it's so awesome I've got those powers laying within my ki :D imagination has always been me, and the best is I actual have an OC I made cause I'm a screaming fangirl of YYH~and Hiei is my fave of couse :b
And funny enough she's also Ookami O.o, different looks but still...
OH yeah, put me on the mailing list Onegai *puppy eyes* Don't know how to do myself 4w4
But here you have a fan, in me :3 I'll check out your Kurama story, cause he's my Nii-san ^w^ and my friend has a crusch on him XD haah...
~Bouken
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January 17, 2008 at 12:00 AM
(Chap: 8)
OMG!!!! Is he going to kill me??!! *teary eyes, heartbeat like a lightening*
God, you always stops the story on the most exiting spot XD!!! I'm so happy there's still a lot of chappies left, but waah... *q* else I think I would flip D___D I need this, it's like drugs... Though I've never tried them ^^;; no way, never... But this makes me imaginine how it would feel to be dinied !!
Moooore *drool*
~Bouken
OMG!!!! Is he going to kill me??!! *teary eyes, heartbeat like a lightening*
God, you always stops the story on the most exiting spot XD!!! I'm so happy there's still a lot of chappies left, but waah... *q* else I think I would flip D___D I need this, it's like drugs... Though I've never tried them ^^;; no way, never... But this makes me imaginine how it would feel to be dinied !!
Moooore *drool*
~Bouken